My first attempt to save you from yourself was inspired by reading about the dangers of excessive drinking. We often hear about drunk driving and health problems, but how often do you read something like this:

State police have charged a central Pennsylvania man with public drunkenness after he was seen giving mouth-to-mouth “resuscitation” to a long-dead opossum along a highway.

Trooper Jamie Levier says several witnesses saw 55-year-old Donald Wolfe, of Brookville, near the animal along Route 36 in Oliver Township Thursday about 3 p.m. The trooper says one person saw Wolfe kneeling before the animal and gesturing as though he were conducting a seance, while another saw the mouth-to-mouth attempt.

Levier says Wolfe was “extremely intoxicated” and “did have his mouth in the area of the animal’s mouth, I guess.”

Oliver Township is about 65 miles northeast of Pittsburgh.

There’s a lesson to be learned here: When you start to think you can resuscitate roadkill, you’ve had too much to drink. Don’t let this happen to you.